some things never change?

I think it was more than a year ago (maybe two?) when I was in this state of emotion => mixed, confusion, excitement... and then reality bit. Yup, before I knew it, it was all over - just one moment and now I'm back to square one. This feeling is indeed so-very familiar to me and I'm sure many people have gone through this as well. I guess I have to learn to wish not and want not. Although I think I've conditioned myself well enough to expect nothing so that I won't be left feeling empty - reality still hits you right where it hurts and at the end, I'm left with this unexplainably challenging situation..... Argh, but such is life - as one always says - so I guess all I can do is cheer up and look forward to the next best thing that's happening in my life? Now, that's a tough call - I think I'm better off counting down the days to Nickelback's concert.....one more week :D

*Listening to The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows by Brand New*

random thoughts....

Sometimes I wish I were more risk-adverse - however, I ultimately know that I am the type of person who would never take uncalculated risks in life. Is that a good or a bad trait? There's always this part of my brain that unconsciously tells me to make the most practical and sensible decision i.e. never make a decision where P(success)<50%. I guess this is my way of avoiding facing a potentially bad outcome. It's actually pretty sad if you think about it....I guess I'd never truly find out since I wouldn't take that leap of faith, would I? On the other hand, because I've already calculated that the P(success) is pretty much lower than 50%, then it's really not worth going through the potential pain/sadness/dissappointment/embarasssment/etc from one *risky* decision, right? I guess I'll never find out....

OK I think I'm growing way too old and senile now rambling about nothingness :o)

*Listening to The '59 Sound by Gaslight Anthem*